Anger Disguises and Anger Management Spectrum

In a recent newsletter article, I wrote about using EFT to break the patterns of anger that can really do damage to us and those we love.

I get most client inquiries from men for anger management yet one of the best reference books I have for patterns of anger is called Healing Rage:Women Making Inner Peace Possible by Ruth King. The book helps you identify your primary anger disguises and gives you a number of practices for healing this rage. EFT, when combined with these practices, can yield to fantastic results.

Anger disguises include behaviours such as:

• Dominance
• Defiance
• Distraction
• Devotion
• Depression
• Dependence

Ruth King's book is from many years of experience in working with women and anger. When I talked to her about how I related to many of the patterns as a man, Ruth said that she could not claim experience with men as she had not worked with them over the years; yet we are all human and feel the same emotions.

Rage is a strong word for anger. It is at the most intense end of the spectrum of this emotion. There is a long path from peeved, annoyed, aggravated, ..., angry,..., enraged. Most of us don't use the words that can help us identify where we are on this spectrum.

Next time you are feeling angry see if you can identify where you are on a scale from 1 - 10 where 1 is peeved or miffed, and 10 is full blown insane rage. Making this distinction helps identify what actions you can take to break the pattern of anger.